Meteor Injures Hundreds in Russia – Horsemeat blamed

Streaking towards earth – The Horse Pasta Apocalypse

Hundreds of people with the time to stand around videoing things have been injured by something aflame and streaking from the sky faster that Superman shooting his bolt.

Speculation that the red-hot streak was actually a gigantic ball of horsemeat falling from God’s own barbecue griddle is yet to be confirmed.

In between swigs of industrial vodka, a concerned local was quoted as saying: “I’ve no objection to meteors in general, but frankly, if it’s supposed to be made of rock, and instead it’s made of horsemeat, then I’m mildly perturbed by what has gone wrong here in the meteor production supply chain. Down with this kind of aberration”.

As none of the world’s astro-boffins seemed to have the faintest inkling that this was going to happen, there’s increasing concern about the projected close-passing of an asteroid a sodding sight bigger that’s also predicted to happen today.

If they got this wrong, then have they really got that one right?

After all, I’ve seen Deep Impact, and Morgan Freeman’s not going to tell us anything until it’s far too late anyway. And he also played God too, in Bruce Almighty. Coincidence or the truth hidden in plain sight?

All of this leaves the door wide open for speculation that some time later today, we’ll experience the same WTF! moment as the dinosaurs did, but this time, at the hands of a rogue mislabeled lasagne the size of Cumbria hurtling at us from outer space.

Watch  the skies…