Because boredom…
A surprising number of people viewing the following offers off t’Internet, but no buyers…

A good hard shag. Go on, treat yourself

Good Hard Shag.
Fantastic hard plastic model of Phalacrocorax aristotelis,
Excellent condition. May PX aluminium sparrow + cash.

Great Pair Of Tits.
One bearded. One blue. May split.

Sizable Cock.
6ft model of rooster. All complete. Minor scratches. Well used. Slight smell of pickled ginger. Open to offers.

Hairy Pie
Steak and ale. Has been dropped crust down on barbershop floor.
Minor leakage around the edges.

Barking Spider.
All 8 legs present and correct. Prone to malfunction.

Red Hot Dripping Beaver.
Electrically unsafe  Castor canadensis, made from beef fat. Will break for spares.

Some Fine Pieces of Ass
Assorted donkey spares. Breaking.